Dinner at Rawlinson End

SIR HENRY: “Help yourself to another glass of Chateau Cholostemy. You know, if I had all the money I’ve spent on drink I’d spend it on drink.”
NARRATOR: “Henry picked his teeth with a fingernail that would not have disgraced a flamenco guitarist. Lady Philippa, herself nicely irrigated with horizontal lubricant, leered appreciatively across at her host.”
PHILIPPA: “Could I have another whisky-and-soda?”
SIR HENRY: “Soda? Never trust anything without a cork in it.”
TARQUIN: “I say, old man, what about good old H2O, then?”
FLORRIE: “Tarquin, dear, Henry detests water: why, he even cleans his teeth in rum!”
NARRATOR: “Faced with the unwanted mockery of a wife, Henry sought instant consolation in the intimate proximity of his one true love – his goblet.”

From the 1980 movie “Sir Henry at Rawlinson End”, screenplay by Vivian Stanshall and Steve Roberts